2 min read

Two Weeks of Soul-Searching in Madeira

Spent the past two weeks in Madeira with some friends...

For the last two and a half years, I've been all in, helping build a product and an engineering team from scratch at Vareto. It was thrilling and challenging, yet, a question lingered: “Why am I doing this?” Sure, the product has a huge potential and the team rocks, but is it truly “me”? I didn’t have a satisfying answer. With the company on firm ground now, I decided to hit the pause button and, just…think.

Arshak, a constant in my life like a family, is going through a similar chapter so we got a secluded house in Madeira high on a hill with an incredible view that served as a backdrop to many hours spent meditating, introspecting, and contemplating our next moves.

I've finally come to a full acknowledgment that my life has been out of balance. Trapped in constant brain stimulation (my work at the company intermingled with side projects and other commitments) disguising as a relentless push for productivity, while avoiding still, quiet moments with myself – essentially dodging the uncomfortable reality that I wasn't leading the life I felt I was meant to live.

The occasional 10-15 minutes of meditation and physical activities like cycling and running brought some reprieve, but deep down, I knew it wasn't enough – and yet, I wasn’t taking any radical steps to address it.

Now, I've recognized that what I truly need is more time—slow, deliberate moments for introspection to figure out my direction and how to approach it. This mindset came pretty naturally in Madeira, where I felt in sync with nature's rhythm, distanced from the frantic pace of the modern world.

This longing for a slower pace reflects my personality to some extent but I think it's also a recognition that we, as a species, haven't quite evolved to sustain today's relentless pace.

I’ll be traveling a bit more before I’m back in LA, mostly seeking out slower-paced, nature-rich environments. This isn’t so much about seeing the world but delving deeper into myself.

re: Madeira, with its perfect weather, stunning landscapes, and tranquil vibe, it might just be the next Bali.